**काँच की बरनी और दो कप चाय **

एक बोध कथा

जीवन में जब सब कुछ एक साथ और जल्दी - जल्दी करने की इच्छा होती है , सब कुछ तेजी से पा लेने की इच्छा होती है , और हमें लगने लगता है कि दिन के चौबीस घंटे भी कम पड़ते हैं , उस समय ये बोध कथा , " काँच की बरनी और दो कप चाय " हमें याद आती है ।

दर्शनशास्त्र के एक प्रोफ़ेसर कक्षा में आये और उन्होंने छात्रों से कहा कि वे आज जीवन का एक महत्वपूर्ण पाठ पढाने वाले हैं

उन्होंने अपने साथ लाई एक काँच की बडी़ बरनी ( जार ) टेबल पर रखा और उसमें टेबल टेनिस की गेंदें डालने लगे और तब तक डालते रहे जब तक कि उसमें एक भी गेंद समाने की जगह नहीं बची .... उन्होंने छात्रों से पूछा - क्या बरनी पूरी भर गई ?
हाँ ... आवाज आई ...
फ़िर प्रोफ़ेसर साहब ने छोटे - छोटे कंकर उसमें भरने शुरु किये धीरे - धीरे बरनी को हिलाया तो काफ़ी सारे कंकर उसमें जहाँ जगह खाली थी , समा गये , फ़िर से प्रोफ़ेसर साहब ने पूछा , क्या अब बरनी भर गई है ,
छात्रों ने एक बार फ़िर हाँ ...
कहा अब प्रोफ़ेसर साहब ने रेत की थैली से हौले - हौले उस बरनी में रेत डालना शुरु किया , वह रेत भी उस जार में जहाँ संभव था बैठ गई , अब छात्र अपनी नादानी पर हँसे ... फ़िर प्रोफ़ेसर साहब ने पूछा , क्यों अब तो यह बरनी पूरी भर गई ना ?
हाँ .. अब तो पूरी भर गई है .. सभी ने एक स्वर में कहा ..
सर ने टेबल के नीचे से चाय के दो कप निकालकर उसमें की चाय जार में डाली , चाय भी रेत के बीच स्थित थोडी़ सी जगह में सोख ली गई ...

प्रोफ़ेसर साहब ने गंभीर आवाज में समझाना शुरु किया – इस काँच की बरनी को तुम लोग अपना जीवन समझो ....
टेबल टेनिस की गेंदें सबसे महत्वपूर्ण भाग अर्थात भगवान , परिवार , बच्चे , मित्र , स्वास्थ्य और शौक हैं ,

छोटे कंकर मतलब तुम्हारी नौकरी , कार , बडा़ मकान आदि हैं , और

रेत का मतलब और भी छोटी - छोटी बेकार सी बातें , मनमुटाव , झगडे़ है ..

अब यदि तुमने काँच की बरनी में सबसे पहले रेत भरी होती तो टेबल टेनिस की गेंदों और कंकरों के लिये जगह ही नहीं बचती , या कंकर भर दिये होते तो गेंदें नहीं भर पाते , रेत जरूर आ सकती थी ...

ठीक यही बात जीवन पर लागू होती है ... यदि तुम छोटी - छोटी बातों के पीछे पडे़ रहोगे और अपनी ऊर्जा उसमें नष्ट करोगे तो तुम्हारे पास मुख्य बातों के लिये अधिक समय नहीं रहेगा ... मन के सुख के लिये क्या जरूरी है ये तुम्हें तय करना है । अपने बच्चों के साथ खेलो , बगीचे में पानी डालो , सुबह पत्नी के साथ घूमने निकल जाओ ,घर के बेकार सामान को बाहर निकाल फ़ेंको , मेडिकल चेक - अप करवाओ ... टेबल टेनिस गेंदों की फ़िक्र पहले करो , वही महत्वपूर्ण है ... पहले तय करो कि क्या जरूरी है ... बाकी सब तो रेत है ..

छात्र बडे़ ध्यान से सुन रहे थे ... अचानक एक ने पूछा , सर लेकिन आपने यह नहीं बताया कि " चाय के दो कप " क्या हैं ? प्रोफ़ेसर मुस्कुराये , बोले .. मैं सोच ही रहा था कि अभी तक ये सवाल किसी ने क्यों नहीं किया ...

इसका उत्तर यह है कि , जीवन हमें कितना ही परिपूर्ण और संतुष्ट लगे , लेकिन अपने खास मित्र के साथ दो कप चाय पीने की जगह हमेशा होनी चाहिये ।

The top five cancer-causing foods are:

1. Chips, crackers, and cookies
All are usually made with white flour and sugar. Even the ones whose labels claim to be free of trans-fats generally contain small amounts of trans-fats.


2. French fries
Like doughnuts, French fries are made with hydrogenated oils and then fried at high temperatures. They also contain cancer- causing acryl amides which occur during the frying process. They should be called cancer fries, not French fries, said Adams .


3. Doughnuts
Doughnuts are cancer-causing double trouble. First, they are made with white flour, sugar, and hydrogenated oils, then fried at high temperatures. Doughnuts, says Adams , may be the worst food you can possibly eat to raise your risk of cancer.

4. Processed meats and Bacon
Also high in the same sodium nitrates found in hot dogs, bacon, and other processed meats raise the risk of heart disease. The saturated fat in bacon also contributes to cancer.



5. Hot Dogs
Because they are high in nitrates, the Cancer Prevention Coalition advises that children eat no more than 12 hot dogs a month. If you can't live without hot dogs, buy those made without sodium nitrate.

The main causes of liver damage are:

1. Sleeping too late and waking up too late are main cause.
2. Not urinating in the morning.
3. Too much eating.
4. Skipping breakfast.
5. Consuming too much medication.
6. Consuming too much preservatives, additives, food coloring and artificial sweetener.
7. Consuming unhealthy cooking oil.
As much as possible reduce cooking oil use when frying, which includes even the best cooking oils like olive oil. Do not consume fried foods when you are tired, except if the body is20very fit.
8. Consuming raw (overly done) foods also add to the burden of liver.
Veggies should be eaten raw or cooked 3-5 parts. Fried veggies should be finished in one sitting, do not store.

We should prevent this without necessarily spending more. We just have to adopt a good daily lifestyle and eating habits. Maintaining good eating habits and time condition are very important for our bodies to absorb and get rid of unnecessary chemicals according to 'schedule.'

BRAIN DAMAGING HABITS

1. No Breakfast
People who do not take breakfast are going to have a lower blood sugar level. This leads to an insufficient supply of nutrients to the brain causing brain degeneration.
2. Overeating
It causes hardening of the brain arteries, leading to a decrease in mental power.
3. Smoking
It causes multiple brain shrinkage and may lead to Alzheimer disease.
4. High Sugar consumption
Too much sugar will interrupt the absorption of proteins and nutrients causing malnutrition and may interfere with brain development.
5. Air Pollution
The brain is the largest oxygen consumer in our 20 body. Inhaling polluted air decreases the supply of oxygen to the brain, bringing about a decrease in brain efficiency.
6 . Sleep Deprivation
Sleep allows our brain to rest.. Long term deprivation from sleep will accelerate the death of brain cells..
7. Head covered while sleeping
Sleeping with the head covered increases the concentration of carbon dioxide and decrease concentration of oxygen that may lead to brain damaging effects.

8. Working your brain during illness
Working hard or studying with sickness may lead to a decrease in effectiveness of the brain as well as damage the brain.
9. Lacking in stimulating thoughts
Thinking is the best way to train our brain, lacking in brain stimulation thoughts may cause brain shrinkage.
10. Talking Rarely
Intellectual conversations will promote the efficiency of the brain

History of Life

God created the donkey - and said to him"You will be a donkey. You will work un-tiringly from sunrise to sunset carrying burdens on your back. You will eat grass, you will have no intelligence and you will live 50 years."
The donkey answered:
"I will be a donkey, but to live 50years is much. Give me only 20years" God granted his wish.
God created the dog - and said to him: "You will guard the house of man. You will be his best Friend. You will eat the scraps that he gives you and you will live 30years. You will be a dog.
The dog answered:
Sir, to live 30years is too much,give me only15 years. God granted his wish.
God created the monkey - and said to him: You will be a monkey. You will swing from branch to branch doing tricks. You will be amusing and you will live 20 years. "
The monkey answered:
To live 20years is too much, give me only 10years. God granted his wish.
Finally God created man - and said to him: You will be man, the only rational creature on the face of the earth. You will use your intelligence to become master over all the animals. You will dominate the world and you will live 20years."

Man responded:
Sir, I will be a man but to live only 20 years is very little,
give me the 30years that the donkey refused, the15years that the dog did not want and the 10years the monkey refused. God granted man's wish.
And since then, man lives 20 years as a man , marries and spends
30 years like a donkey, working and carrying all the burdens on his back. Then when his children are grown, he lives 15years like a dog taking care of the house and eating whatever is given to him, so that when he is old, he can retire and live 10years like a monkey, going from house to house and from one son or daughter to another doing tricks to amuse his grandchildren.

That's Life.

Attitude … and “The Power of One"

Getting the best from yourself and others, all starts with one: one thought … one word … one action.

“One” is the first note in orchestrating the personal attitude that shapes and directs your life – and impacts the members of your team. Contrary to the lyrics from a classic rock song, one is not the loneliest number. It’s the most important one!

Your thoughts, words, and actions are like individual notes that work in concert to create the power of one person – YOU – to make a difference. You can harness your “power of one” if you simply:
• Catch one negative thought and turn it into a positive one;
• Think of one thing for which you are grateful at the beginning of each day;
• Say one “Fantastic!” when a friend or team member asks how you are doing;
• Assume the best in one upcoming situation;
• Keep on moving one more time when you experience adversity;
• Help one friend or colleague in a time of need – and take pride in it.

A single act can make a difference … it can create a ripple effect felt many miles and people away. So, ask yourself: What’s one thing I can do today that will make a positive difference in my attitude? Then DO IT!
Repeat this process every day and your life will improve – and so will the lives of the people you lead. Attitudes are truly powerful … and they’re contagious!

8 key ratios to spot the right stocks

Book value per share:

This ratio shows the worth of each share of a company as per the company's accounting books. It is calculated as: Book Value per share = Shareholders' funds / Total quantity of equity shares issued
Shareholders' funds can be computed by subtracting the total liabilities (money owed to creditors) of the company from its total assets. It can also be calculated by adding the equity capital to the company's reserves. Book value is an old record that uses the original purchase prices of the assets. However it doesn't show the present market price of the company's assets. As a result, this ratio has a restricted use when it comes to estimating the market price of the shares, but can give you an estimate of the minimum price of the company's shares. It will also help you judge if the share price is overpriced or under-priced.
Earnings per share (EPS):

One of the most popular investment ratios, it can be computed as:
Earnings per Share (EPS) = Profit Post Tax / Total quantity of equity shares issued
This ratio computes the company's earnings on a per share basis. E.g. you own 100 shares of ABC Co., each having a face value of Rs 10. Assume the earnings per share is Rs 10 and the dividend declared is 30 per cent, or Rs 3 per share. This implies that on every share of ABC Co, you earn Rs. 6 each year, but you actually get Rs 3 via dividend. The balance of Rs 4 per share goes into the plough back (retained earnings). Had you purchased these shares at par, it implies a return of 60 per cent. This example shows that instead of looking at the dividends received from to company as the base of investment returns, always look at earnings per share, as it is the actual indicator of the returns earned by your shares.
Price earnings ratio (P/E):

This ratio highlights the connection between the market price of a share and its EPS.
Price/Earnings Ratio (P/E) = Price of the share / Earnings per share
It shows the degree to which earnings of a share are protected by its price. E.g. if the P/E is 40, it means the share price is 40 times its earnings. So if the company's EPS is constant, it will need about 40 years to make up for the purchase price of the share, after taking into account the dividends and the capital appreciation. Hence low P/E means you will recover your money quickly. P/E ratio shows what the market thinks about the earnings potential and future business forecast of a company. Companies with high P/E ratios are the darlings of the investors and thus enjoy a higher market rating. In order to use the P/E ratio properly, take into account the future earnings and growth projections of the company. If the current P/E ratio is low, as against the future prospects of a company, then the shares make an attractive investment option. But if the company is saddled with losses and falling sales, stay away from it, despite the low P/E ratio.
Dividend:

Dividend is the portion of the profit that is distributed amongst shareholders. Companies offering high dividends, normally don't have much of growth to talk about. This is because the plough back required to finance future development is insufficient. Similarly, those companies in high growth sector don't give any dividend. Instead here they give sharp capital appreciation, which ultimately will lead to higher dividends. So it makes much more sense to invest for capital appreciation instead of dividends. Rather it makes more sense to invest for yield, which is nothing but the association between the dividends and the market price of the shares.
Yield:

(dividend yield) can be calculated as:

Yield = (Dividend per share / market price of a share) x 100
Yield shows the returns in percentage that you can expect via dividends earned by your investment at the current market price. It is more useful than simply focusing on the dividends.
Return on capital employed (ROCE):

ROCE is the ratio that is calculated as:
ROCE: Operating profit / capital employed (net value + debt)
To get operating profit, add old taxes paid, depreciation, special one-off expenses, and special one-off income and miscellaneous income to get the net profit. The operating profit is a far better indicator of the profits earned by the company instead of the net profit. Hence this ratio is the better indicator of the general performance of the company and the company's operational efficiency. It is one of the most useful ratio that lets you compare amongst the companies.
Return on net worth (RONW):

RONW is calculated as RONW = Net Profit / Net Worth
This ratio gives you an idea of the returns generated by investing in the company. While ROCE is an effective measure to get a general overview of the profitability of the company's business operations, RONW lets you gauge the returns you can earn on your investment. When used along with ROCE, you get an overview of the company's competence, financial standing and its capacity to generate returns on shareholders' finances and capital employed.
PEG ratio:

PEG is an essential and extensively used ratio for calculating the inbuilt worth of a share. It helps you decide whether the share is under-priced, totally priced or overpriced. To derive the ratio, you have to associate the P/E ratio with the expected growth rate of the company. It assumes that higher the growth rate of the company, higher the P/E ratio of the company's shares. Vice versa also holds true.
PEG = P/E / expected growth rate of the EPS of the company
In general, a PEG lesser than 0.5 is a lucrative investment opportunity. However if the PEG exceeds 1.5, it is time to sell. These are some of the most critical ratios that must be considered when purchasing a share. Extensive reading of the financial performance of the company in newspapers and magazines will help you get all the relevant information to get the correct decision

Inspirational Quotes

Ø Yesterday is the past, tomorrow is the future but today is a gift – that’s why we call it as present.
Ø The best way to make our dreams true is to wake up on time.
Ø Reading without thinking is like eating without digesting.
Ø If I had eight hours to chop a tree then I would spend six hours to sharpen my axe.
Ø Nothing fades faster than a new idea in a closed mind.
Ø Make new friends, but keep the old; those are silver but these are gold.
Ø Choice, not chance determines destiny.
Ø Great minds have purposes…others have wishes.
Ø Everything comes too late for those who only wait.
Ø Progress is the activity of today but the assurance of tomorrow.

My Result Day by Ishika

ON 28 March it was a result day. When I sat in my car I was very sad .I was thinking that I will not get any rank then we went to school. The award ceremony was started. When the ma’ m said IV class then I was very scared. First was my classmate Tanmay and second was I. when the ma’m said Ishika mogra. I was very shocked. When I went to stage I was awarded the silver medal. My maths teacher said that she was very happy with her maths marks. I got 96 marks in maths. When we went home we called many places like nana nani and dada dadi. T hey all are very happy. We went to Gaurav Tower we eat so many things like pizza, sandwich, kulfi, sweet corn etc then I promise on now onwards I would always come among top 3 ranker among the class.

Build Your Self Confidence

One of the most important steps to achieving your goals in life is to develop a strong sense of self confidence. This does not however involve becoming loud or arrogant. On the contrary, people with genuine self confidence are usually calm and self assured and do not need to 'big note' themselves.

Here are my top ten tips for building your self confidence:

1. Visualise Yourself As The Person You Want To Be
Each morning spend a few minutes visualising yourself as the person you want to be. Think about the way you dress, the way you carry yourself and the way you interact with other people. Seeing yourself as the person you want to become is the first step towards building self confidence.
2. Self Confidence Statement

After visualising yourself as the person you want to be, read the following statement out loud:"I know I have the ability to achieve my major goal in life. Therefore today,I demand of myself persistent and continuous action towards achieving my goal"Reading this statement out loud is a great way to start your day in a confident state of mind.
3. Dress Well

One of the most effective ways to instantly improve your level of self confidence is to dress well and to make the decision to always be well groomed. This does not mean you have to go out and buy a whole new wardrobe. Instead, just focus on gradually building up a small collection of good quality clothes. Also remember that simple accessories such as a tie clip or necklace can make a big difference to the way you look and feel.
4. Positive Posture

Another powerful way to build your sense of self confidence is to stand up straight and lose the slouch that many of us have acquired over the years. While you may be able to make a change to your posture by simply becoming aware of it, the best way to make a long lasting change to your posture is to practice yoga or pilates.
5. Move With Purpose

A simple but effective tip for increasing your levels of self confidence is to always move with a sense of purpose. In his book 'The Magic of Thinking Big', David Schwartz recommends walking 25% faster than normal. Having a spring in your step lets people know that you have important things to do and actually makes you feel more confident as you go about your daily business.
6. Become A Participant

Have you ever noticed that in most meetings or groups, people immediately head towards the back of the room so that they can remain as inconspicuous as possible? A great way to increase your visibility and sense of self confidence is to make the decision to always sit towards the front of the room and be a participant. When you have something to say - don't be afraid to say it.
7. Connect With Confidence

Another way to quickly improve your self confidence is to practice making a strong first impression. When you meet someone face-to-face, look them directly in the eye, smile broadly, shake hands firmly and say, "Hi Jim, nice to meet you".Similarly, you can sound more confident on the phone by answering, "Good morning Carol Jones speaking" instead of simply saying "Hello"
8. Build Your Success File

Occasionally your self confidence will take a hit when something doesn't work out the way you hoped. One of the best ways to repair your self confidence in this situation is to keep a folder outlining your past achievements and successes. You should also include any positive feedback that you've received from others.As you review your success file and fill your mind with positive comments, your doubts and insecurities will quickly disappear and your self confidence will be restored.
9. Preparation

The BIG secret to being self confident that people rarely talk about is - preparation. The more you prepare and practice for an event, the more self confident you will become.If you are worried about an upcoming event, use your apprehension as a stimulus to take action and practice, practice, practice. The simple but powerful truth is that self confidence grows through repetition and experience.
10. Toastmasters

Final tip for developing self confidence is to join a Toastmasters group.Toastmasters is a non-profit organisation that helps people from all walks of life to develop their public speaking and leadership skills. In my experience Toastmasters offers a safe and relaxed environment to step out of your comfort zone and develop the invaluable skills of being able to think on your feet and speak in public.

Good Jokes....enjoy !!!

1. Police arrested a drunkard & askd: Where r u goin?
Man: I'm goin 2 listen lecture on ill effcts of drinking.
Cop: Who'll lecture at midnite?
Man: My wife...
2. Law Professor: Which is the most important LAW of Finance for Starting a New Business
Student: Father-in-Law!
3. Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.
4. What's the biggest pressure for Pak captain when Pak needs 1 run to win in 8 ovrs, with 5 wickets in hand?
Ya Allah! How to speak English in presentation ceremony?
5. Beggar: Saab 12Rs do na coffee peeni hai.
Man: Lekin coffee to 6Rs ki hai?
Beggar: Par saab girlfrend bhi to hai.
Man: Bhikari hokar bhi GF banali.
Beggar: Na saab,GF ne Bhikari bana diya!
6. Q: Why do women live longer than men?
A: Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bill does!
7. Q: Wats the diff between Complete & Finished?
A: If you find good wife u r complete otherwise u r finished.
8. So many options: Poison, sleeping pills, hanging, jumping from a building, lying on train tracks, but we chose Marriage, slow and sure!
9. Have u heard about the man who threw his wife into a pond of crocodiles?
He's now being harassed by the animal rights for being cruel to the crocodiles.
10. Two men r talking.
1st: I got married coz I was tired of eating out, cleaning the house, doing the laundry & wearing shabby clothes.
2nd: Amazing, I just got divorced for the very same reasons
11.Wife: If I dismiss the cook and make the food myself for a month, what will you pay me?
Husband: I won't have to pay you, you'll get my entire insurance amount.

WHAT IS A FRIEND?

Your Heart is your Love,
Your love is your Family ,
Your family is your Future ,
Your future is your Destiny ,
Your destiny is your Ambition,
Your ambition is your Aspiration ,
Your aspiration is your Motivation ,
Your motivation is your Belief ,
Your belief is your Peace ,
Your peace is your Target ,
Your target is Heaven,
Heaven is no fun without FRIENDS

CRICKET

Most runs in ODIs AS ON 05.04.2009

Name Matches Runs Ave 100 50
Sachin Tendulkar 425 16684 44.37 43 91
Sanath Jayasuriya 432 13151 32.71 28 67
Inzamam-ul-Haq 378 11739 39.52 10 83
Ricky Ponting 311 11402 42.70 26 66
Sourav Ganguly 311 11363 41.02 22 72
Rahul Dravid 333 10585 39.49 12 81
Brian Lara 299 10405 40.48 19 63
JH Kallis 287 10057 45.30 16 71
Adam Gilchrist 287 9619 36.89 16 55
M Azharuddin 334 9378 36.92 7 58

COCONUT WATER

'It's a natural isotonic beverage, with the same level of electrolytic balance as we have in our blood. It's the fluid of life, so to speak. During the Pacific War of 1941-45, both sides in the conflict regularly used coconut water - siphoned directly from the nut - to give emergency plasma transfusions to wounded soldiers. Most coconut water is still consumed fresh in tropical coastal areas once exposed to air, the liquid rapidly loses most of its organoleptic and nutritional characteristics, and begins to ferment.
Coconut Water is More Nutritious than whole milk Less fat and NO cholesterol.
Coconut Water is More Healthy than Orange Juice - Much lower calories.
Coconut Water is Better than processed baby milk. It contains lauric acid, which is present in human mother's milk.
Coconut water is naturally sterile Water permeates though the filtering husk
Coconut water is a universal donor Its identical to human blood plasma
Coconut water is the very stuff of Nature, biologically Pure, full of Natural Sugars, Salts, and Vitamins to ward off fatigue... and is the next wave of energy drinks but natural.
According to Mortin Satin, Chief of the United Nation's Food & Agriculture Organization- Coconut water contains more potassium (at about 294 mg) than most sports drinks (117 mg) Coconut water has less sodium (25mg) where sports drinks have around 41mg and energy drinks have about 200mg.
Coconut water has 5mg of Natural Sugars where sports and energy drinks range from 10-25mg of Altered Sugars.
Coconut water is very high in Chloride at 118mg compared to sports drinks at about 39mg.
Data is based on a 100ml drink

TAXES

1. What are you doing----- Business----- PAY PROFESSIONAL TAX
2. What are you doing in Business?----- Selling the Goods-----PAY SALES TAX
3. From where are you getting Goods?------From other State/Abroad-------- PAY CENTRAL SALES TAX, CUSTOM DUTY & OCTROI
4. What are you getting in Selling Goods? ------Profit------ PAY INCOME TAX
5. How do you distribute profit?--------By way of dividend--------Pay dividend Tax
6. Where you Manufacturing the Goods?------Factory -------PAY EXCISE DUTY
7. Do you have Office / Warehouse/ Factory?-------Yes------PAY MUNICIPAL & FIRE TAX
8. Do you have Staff?--------Yes----------PAY STAFF PROFESSIONAL TAX
9. Doing business in Millions?--------Yes---------PAY TURNOVER TAX-------No------Then pay Minimum Alternate Tax
10. Are you taking out over 25,000 Cash from Bank?-------Yes, for Salary------PAY CASH HANDLING TAX
11. Where are you taking your client for Lunch & Dinner?---------Hotel-----------PAY FOOD & ENTERTAINMENT TAX
12. Are you going Out of Station for Business?----------Yes--------PAY FRINGE BENEFIT TAX >>13) 13. Have you taken or given any Service/s?--------Yes---------PAY SERVICE TAX
14. How come you got such a Big Amount?----------Gift on birthday------- PAY GIFT TAX
15. Do you have any Wealth?--------Yes----------PAY WEALTH TAX
16. To reduce Tension, for entertainment, where are you going?----------Cinema or Resort---------- PAY ENTERTAINMENT TAX
17. Have you purchased House?--------Yes--------PAY STAMP DUTY & REGISTRATION FEE
18. How you Travel?-----------Bus---------PAY SURCHARGE
19. Any Additional Tax?--------------Yes----------PAY EDUCATIONAL, ADDITIONAL EDUCATIONAL & SURCHARGE ON ALL THE>CENTRAL GOVT.'s TAX
20. Delayed any time Paying Any Tax?--------------Yes---------- PAY INTEREST & PENALTY
21. Do you wish to cross the bridge while go back home?-----------Yes--------PAY TOLL
22. INDIAN :: can i die now??----------Please wait we are about to launch the funeral tax!!!

My Result Day by Vaibhav

The most scaring day for a student in his school life is the result day. Results are always scaring, no matter whether a student is getting 1st rank or whether a student is failing. Results always give us nervousness. I have also not been able to escape from this nervousness. My final examination had ended a few days before and then we had our holidays. Starting of holidays was full of fun and enjoyment but as the date of 28th march was coming nearer, fun & enjoyment was been replaced by a scare for result. Although I was knowing that I had given a good performance but then also my heart was not at peace. At last, the day came. I woke up early as the whole night I was dreaming only about tomorrow. Then we went to school. I saw my friends there, who were enjoying. At the entrance only I got my result of final examination, as my name was written on the board but then also I was tensed about my total percentage. When we reached school, the students of 2nd class were being awarded and I had to wait a little till the turn of 8th class came. When principal ma’m called my name as the topper of my class, I felt very happy. Rest of the day was also very good. I played games on computer, completed all my works that I had left incomplete due to m exams. In evening I went to “Gauruv Tower” and enjoyed. Inspite of the nervousness, I came out successfully and got the gold medal and that is the only thing I want in my exams.

The 10 biggest falls in Sensex history

Jan 21, 2008: The Sensex saw its highest ever loss of 1,408 points at the end of the session on Monday. The Sensex recovered to close at 17,605.40 after it tumbled to the day's low of 16,963.96, on high volatility as investors panicked following weak global cues amid fears of the US recession.
Jan 22, 2008: The Sensex saw its biggest intra-day fall on Tuesday when it hit a low of 15,332, down 2,273 points. However, it recovered losses and closed at a loss of 875 points at 16,730. The Nifty closed at 4,899 at a loss of 310 points. Trading was suspended for one hour at the Bombay Stock Exchange after the benchmark Sensex crashed to a low of 15,576.30 within minutes of opening, crossing the circuit limit of 10 per cent.
May 18, 2006: The Sensex registered a fall of 826 points (6.76 per cent) to close at 11,391, following heavy selling by FIIs, retail investors and a weakness in global markets. The Nifty crashed by 496.50 points (8.70%) points to close at 5,208.80 points.

December 17, 2007: A heavy bout of selling in the late noon deals saw the index plunge to a low of 19,177 - down 856 points from the day's open. The Sensex finally ended with a huge loss of 769 points (3.8%) at 19,261. The NSE Nifty ended at 5,777, down 271 points.
October 18, 2007: Profit-taking in noon trades saw the index pare gains and slip into negative zone. The intensity of selling increased towards the closing bell, and the index tumbled all the way to a low of 17,771 - down 1,428 points from the day's high. The Sensex finally ended with a hefty loss of 717 points (3.8%) at 17,998. The Nifty lost 208 points to close at 5,351.
January 18, 2008: Unabated selling in the last one hour of trade saw the index tumble to a low of 18,930 - down 786 points from the day's high. The Sensex finally ended with a hefty loss of 687 points (3.5%) at 19,014. The index thus shed 8.7% (1,813 points) during the week. The NSE Nifty plunged 3.5% (208 points) to 5,705.
November 21, 2007: Mirroring weakness in other Asian markets, the Sensex saw relentless selling. The index tumbled to a low of 18,515 - down 766 points from the previous close. The Sensex finally ended with a loss of 678 points at 18,603. The Nifty lost 220 points to close at 5,561.

August 16, 2007: The Sensex, after languishing over 500 points lower for most of the trading sesion, slipped again towards the close to a low of 14,345. The index finally ended with a hefty loss of 643 points at 14,358.
April 02, 2007: The Sensex opened with a huge negative gap of 260 points at 12,812 following the Reserve Bank of India decision to hike the cash reserve ratio and repo rate. Unabated selling, mainly in auto and banking stocks, saw the index drift to lower levels as the day progressed. The index tumbled to a low of 12,426 before finally settling with a hefty loss of 617 points (4.7%) at 12,455.

August 01, 2007: The Sensex opened with a negative gap of 207 points at 15,344 amid weak trends in the global market and slipped deeper into the red. Unabated selling across-the-board saw the index tumble to a low of 14,911. The Sensex finally ended with a hefty loss of 615 points at 14,936. The NSE Nifty ended at 4,346, down 183 points. This is the third biggest loss in absolute terms for the index.

BSE SENSEX - A HISTORY

BSE Sensex or Bombay Stock Exchange Sensitive Index is a value-weighted index of 30 stocks started in April, 1984. It consists of the 30 largest and most actively traded stocks, representative of various sectors, on the BSE. These companies account for around one-fifth of the market capitalization of the BSE. The base value of the sensex is 100 on April 1, 1979, and the base year of BSE-SENSEX is 1978-79. At regular intervals, the Bombay Stock Exchange (BSE) authorities review and modify its composition to make sure it reflects current market conditions. The index is calculated based on a free-float capitalization method; a variation of the market cap method. Instead of using a company's outstanding shares it uses its float, or shares that are readily available for trading. The free-float method, therefore, does not include restricted stocks, such as those held by company insiders. The index has increased by over ten times from June 1990 to the present. Using information from April 1979 onwards, the long-run rate of return on the BSE Sensex works out to be 18.6% per annum, which translates to roughly 9% per annum after compensating for inflation.

Sensex milestones
Here is a timeline on the rise and rise of the Sensex through Indian stock market history.
1000 - July 25, 1990 - On July 25, 1990, the Sensex touched the four-digit figure for the first time and closed at 1,001 in the wake of a good monsoon and excellent corporate results.
2000 - January 15, 1992 - On January 15, 1992, the Sensex crossed the 2,000-mark and closed at 2,020 followed by the liberal economic policy initiatives undertaken by the then finance minister and current Prime Minister Dr Manmohan Singh.
3000 - February 29, 1992 - On February 29, 1992, the Sensex surged past the 3000 mark in the wake of the market-friendly Budget announced by Manmohan Singh.
4000 - March 30, 1992 - On March 30, 1992, the Sensex crossed the 4,000-mark and closed at 4,091 on the expectations of a liberal export-import policy. It was then that the Harshad Mehta scam hit the markets and Sensex witnessed unabated selling.
5000 - October 11, 1999 - On October 8, 1999, the Sensex crossed the 5,000-mark as the BJP-led coalition won the majority in the 13th Lok Sabha election.
6000 - February 11, 2000 - On February 11, 2000, the information technology boom helped the Sensex to cross the 6,000-mark and hit and all time high of 6,006.
7000 - June 21, 2005 - On June 20, 2005, the news of the settlement between the Ambani Brothers boosted investor sentiments and the scrips of RIL, Reliance Energy, Reliance Capital and IPCL made huge gains. This helped the Sensex crossed 7,000 points for the first time.
8000 - September 8, 2005 - On September 8, 2005, the Bombay Stock Exchange's benchmark 30-share index – the Sensex - crossed the 8000 level following brisk buying by foreign and domestic funds in early trading.
9000 - December 9, 2005 - The Sensex on November 28, 2005 crossed 9000 to touch 9000.32 points during mid-session at the Bombay Stock Exchange on the back of frantic buying spree by foreign institutional investors and well supported by local operators as well as retail investors.
10,000 - February 7, 2006 - The Sensex on February 6, 2006 touched 10,003 points during mid-session. The Sensex finally closed above the 10,000-mark on February 7, 2006.
11,000 - March 27, 2006 - The Sensex on March 21, 2006 crossed 11,000 and touched a peak of 11,001 points during mid-session at the Bombay Stock Exchange for the first time. However, it was on March 27, 2006 that the Sensex first closed at over 11,000 points.
12,000 - April 20, 2006 - The Sensex on April 20, 2006 crossed 12,000 and touched a peak of 12,004 points during mid-session at the Bombay Stock Exchange for the first time.
13,000 - October 30, 2006 - The Sensex on October 30, 2006 crossed 13,000 for the first time. It touched a peak of 13,039.36 and finally closed at 13,024.26.
14,000 - December 5, 2006 - The Sensex on December 5, 2006 crossed 14,000.
15,000 - July 6, 2007 - The Sensex on July 6, 2007 crossed 15,000 mark.
16,000 - September 19, 2007 - The Sensex on September 19, 2007 crossed the 16,000 mark.
17,000 - September 26, 2007 - The Sensex on September 26, 2007 crossed the 17,000 mark for the first time.
18,000 - October 9, 2007 - The Sensex on October 09, 2007 crossed the 18,000 mark for the first time.
19,000 - October 15, 2007 - The Sensex on October 15, 2007 crossed the 19,000 mark for the first time.
20,000 - October 29, 2007 - The Sensex on October 29, 2007 crossed the 20,000 mark for the first time.
21,000 - Jan 08, 2008 - The Sensex on January 08, 2008 touched all time peak of 21078 before closing at 20873.

Happy Country - Essay written by Vaibhav - My Son

When every Indian is happy then India is happy, when no one sleeps hungry then India is happy, when we respect each other then India is happy.
Every time we think that what we have got from our country, we never think what we have given to the country or what is our contribution for the development of the country. Let us sit and brood for a while, if J.R.D. Tata had also thought the same way of getting something from the country, how could we have those industries and steel plants which have formed the very base of industrializing India, first airlines in the form of Air India and aircraft industries etc. etc. The answer to this question is very simple, as he didn’t thought the way we people think so and ultimately the result is before us. Every one knows what is the moral responsibility of his or her i.e. to respect our elders and to love our Youngers, not to tell lies but these are only the printed words in the books or the ethical words for giving speech to others.
The question here is that what do we do for our country and the society. Only printed words and knowledge will not make a happy country until and unless we do not implement our ethics or good behaviour in our daily lives and works.
People need a good environment and peace in the country, good relations between neighbours, good governance and uncorrupt politicians. After all a peaceful environment provides good people and a happy country. Unemployment, corruption and violence are the major issues today.
The people should know their roles and responsibilities and should also know their rights and duties delegated by the constitution. The government should provide the basic necessities of food, clothing and shelter to all the people and should provide good education to all irrespective of their religions. The government should take rigid action against terrorism and the persons supporting it.
Communalism and Casteism is the main hurdle in the path of development. We should not discriminate people; steps should be taken to eradicate poverty. Security should be tight, then only India will be regarded as a Happy And A Well Developed Nation.
The old politicians must retire and give way to youngsters. We know that there are many such corrupt politicians and police officers. We know that the system was thick of dirt. We know that there are many tainted persons controlling the system. The election commission is slowly and steadily trying to clean the source of this dirt. All we need now is acceleration. We need the people in the authority to pin these hooligans who wear a mask of nation-builders and regulators to be punished as early as possible. Let there be no delay.
We have to first understand the most important and essential things necessary for any developing country. A healthy tree needs water, oxygen, sunlight and minerals to grow. If any of these things is inappropriate, the health of the tree suffers. If the tree is equated to a country, I would equate water, oxygen and sunlight to Defence, Law And Order and Education. Like the oxygen, water, sunlight and minerals to a tree, so is the importance of a strong Defence, an effective policing and judiciary and good education to a country. Take away any of them the country will not survive…it will perish.
I have always believed that identification of people through caste and religious sects is a very wrong divide in the society. These man-made identifiers are indelible and remained labeled throughout the lives of the people. We must not forget the fact that we all are humans, we have the same blood, flesh and bones. Then why are we different from each other? Why should one lo0k down upon others simply on the basis of caste, religion, colour of skin etc?
In India many people are still unemployed who don’t have enough money to spend for their food even. Despite of the technological advancement the country still faces the severity of poverty. When so many people are living below the poverty line then how can we dream of emerging as a great power in the world’s arena. Many people are still deprived of the basic necessities food, clothing and shelter which gives rise to discontentment and the result of which cam be seen in the form of dacoities, kidnappings etc.
Dr.A.P.J Abdul Kalam through his vision 2020 has given a call to the Indians to cooperate to make India a developed nation by 2020. All the people who wanted to see India on the path of progress and prosperity are happy at this declaration. Today the country needs zealous and enthusiastic thinking combined with the age-old moral values and scientific attitude and development which can play an important role in making India a developed nation as their shouldn’t be any compromise with the core values and development as thought by TATA, then only India will be regarded as a HAPPY COUNTRY.

“Thinking is wasting our time, therefore let us do good and make our country in all spheres i.e. social, economical and technological by following the slogan –
“Jai Jawan" "Jai Kisan" "Jai Vigyan"
or
"It is not how much you do, but how much love you put in the doing."

Film with Most Number of Songs

Madan Theatres' Indra Sabha with 71 songs is the film with most number of songs. The film was made in 1932 and the director of the film was J.J. Madan. The plot of the film revolves around a benevolent king whose moral character is tested by celestial powers. They cause an apsara (a fairy) to appear before the king as a fallen woman begging for mercy. Indra Sabha was based on a play written by Sayed Aga Hasan Amanat. The film had two singers Master Nissar and Jehanara Kajjan. The other cast of the film included Abdul Rehman Kabuli and Mukhtar Begum.

Largest Cave in India

Amarnath Cave in Jammu & Kashmir is the largest cave in India. The width of the cave is around 40 yard, its height is about 75 feet; and the cave slopes 80 feet deep down inside the mountain. Amarnath Cave is an important pilgrimage shrine for the Hindus. The cave is famous for the image of Shiva, in the form of a lingam that is formed naturally of an ice-stalagmite, and which waxes and wanes with the moon. Amarnath Cave is situated at an altitude of 3888m and is 45 km from Pahalgam. The trek from Pahalgam to Amarnath cave is on an ancient peregrine route. The 45-km distance is covered in four days, with night halts at Chandanwari, Sheshnag and Panchtarni.

Highest Gateway in India

Buland Darwaza is the highest gateway in India. Buland Darwaza was built by the Mughal Emperor Akbar in 1601 A.D. at Fatehpur Sikri to commemorate his victory over Gujarat. Buland Darwaza is 53.63m high and 35 meters wide. The structure is approached by 42 steps. Buland Darwaza is made of red and buff sandstone, decorated by carving and inlaying of white and black marble. The Buland Darwaza is semi octagonal in plan and is topped by pillars and chhatris. It is adorned with calligraphic inscriptions from the Quran. There are thirteen smaller domed kiosks on the roof, stylized battlement and small turrets and inlay work of white and black marble. An inscription on the central face of the Buland Darwaza displays Akbar's religious broad mindedness. It is attributed to Jesus Christ and reads, "The World is but a bridge, pass over but build no houses on it." A Persian inscription on eastern arch way of the Buland Darwaza records Akbar's conquest over Deccan in 1601 A.D

First Indian SEZ

Kandla Special Economic Zone (KASEZ) in Gujarat was the first Indian SEZ. It was set up in 1965 and in fact KASEZ was the first SEZ to be set up in Asia. Kandla SEZ is also the largest multi-product SEZ in India, spread over 1.2 sq miles. Kandla SEZ is located just 9 km away from the modern-all-weather Indian port of Kandla. India was one of the first countries in Asia to recognize the effectiveness of the Export Processing Zone (EPZ) model in promoting exports. To overcome the shortcomings experienced on account of the multiplicity of controls and clearances; absence of world-class infrastructure, and an unstable fiscal regime and with a view to attract larger foreign investments in India, the Special Economic Zones (SEZs) Policy was announced in April 2000.

BULLETIN BOARD

#Sign on a railway station at Patna:
Aana free, jaana free,pakde gaye to khana free.
#Seen on a bulletin board:
Success is relative...More the success, more the relatives.
#Sign at a barber's saloon in Juhu, Bombay:
We need your heads to run our business.
#A traffic slogan:
Don't let your kids drive if they are not old enough - or else theynever will be...
#Sign in a restaurant:
All drinking water in this establishment has been personally passed by the manager...
#THE BEST ONE BY INDIAN ARMED FORCES:
Its God's responsibility to forgive the terrorist organizations suchas Jaish, Lashkar etc. It's our responsibility to arrange the meeting between them and God.

FAMILY PROBLEM

Two men met at a bus stop and struck up aconversation.

One of them kept complaining of family problems.

Finally, the other man said:"You think you have family problems? Listen to mysituation.

A few years ago, I met a young widow with a grown-updaughter.We got married and got myself a stepdaughter.Later, my father married my stepdaughter.That made my stepdaughter, my step-mother.And my father became my stepson.Also, my wife became mother-in-law of her father-in-law. Much later the daughter of my wife, my stepmother, had a son.This boy was my half-brother because he was my father's son. But he was also the son of my wife's daughter which made him my wife's grand-son.That made me the grand-father of my half-brother. This was nothing until my wife and I had a Baby. Now the half-sister of my son, my stepmother, is also the Grandmother.This makes my father, the brother-in-law of my child, whose stepsister is my father's wife, I am my stepmother's brother-in-law, my wife is her own child's aunt, my son is my father's nephew and I am my OWN GRANDFATHER.

And you think you have FAMILY PROBLEMS.

CORPORATE BHAGAWAD GEETHA

Hey PARTH,

Increment nahin mila, bura hua

Salary cut ho raha hai, bura ho raha hai

Retrenchment hoga, wo bhi bura hi hoga

Tum pichhla review na hone ka paschataap na karo

Tum agle review na hone ki chinta na karo

Recession chal raha hai...

Tumhare pocket se kyagaya jo tum rote ho ?

Tum company ke liye kya business laye the jo tumne kho diya ?

Tumne aisa kaun sa product banaya tha jo fail ho gaya ?

Tum koi experience le kar nahin aaye the...

Jo experience liya company se liya...

Jo project kiya company ke liye...

Degree le kar aaye, experience lekar chale jaoge...

Jo function aaj tumhara hai, Wo kal kisi aur ka tha...

parson kisi aur ka hoga...

Tum ise apna samajh kar kyon magan ho rahe ho

Hey Paarth, Yahi khushi tumhare tension ka kaaran hai...

Kyon wyarth tension lete ho, kis se wyarth darte ho

Kaun tumhein nikaal sakta hai ?

Policy change to company ka rule hai

Jise tum policy change kehte ho, woh to Management ki trick hai...

Ek pal mein tum Increment ke baare mein sochte ho

Doosre hi pal mein tum stipend par aa jate ho...

Review, increment etc. etc. sab mann se hataa do

Vichar se mita do, phir company tumhari hai, tum company ke ho...

Na yeh increment wagerah tumhare liye hain,

Na tum iske kabil ho, Parantu job secure hai,

aisa socho phir tumhein tension kyon hoga ?

Tum apne aap ko Company ko arpit kar do

Yahi sabse bada Golden Rule hai...

Jo is Golden Rule ko janta hai

Wo review, incentive, recession, retrenchment aadi

Bhramon se Sada sarvada muqt hai.

Chal UTH, Kaam Kar, Promotion Ki Chinta mat kar Parth..

Karm hi Tera Bhagya hai...

Morning Prayer

When I say Good Morning I mean to say:

G -od O-ffers us His O -utstanding D –evotion to
M -ake us O- bedient & R -eady for a N -ew day with Him. I -nspire others please, & N -ever forget G -od loves you !

Awesome IQ...

1.Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: 'Free to good home. You want it, you take it.' For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided that people were too un-trusting of this deal. It looked too good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: 'Fridge for sale $50.' The next day someone stole it!

2.One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone shouted....'Look at that dead bird!' Someone looked up at the sky and said...'where?'

3.I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, 'Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her head?' I had to explain that a person's nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned...

4.I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. 'Now,' she asked me, 'Has your plane arrived yet?'... (I work with professionals like this.)

5.While working at a pizza parlour I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. 'Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.

MERA BHARAT MAHAAN

We couldn't help making this comparison.
Inches of rain in new Orleans due to hurricane Katrina... 18
Inches of rain in Mumbai (July 27th).... 37.1
Population of new Orleans... 484,674
Population of Mumbai.... 12,622,500
Deaths in new Orleans within 48 hours of Katrina... 100
Deaths in Mumbai within 48hours of rain… 37.
Number of people to be evacuated in new Orleans... entire city, wohh
Number of people evacuated in Mumbai... 10,000
Cases of shooting and violence in new Orleans... Countless
Cases of shooting and violence in Mumbai… NONE
Time taken for US army to reach new Orleans... 48hours
Time taken for Indian army and navy to reach Mumbai... 12hours
Status 48hours later...new Orleans is still waiting for relief, army and electricity
Status 48hours later…Mumbai is back on its feet and is business is as usual
USA...world's most developed nation
India...third world country.

Father and Children

HOW A SON or DAUGHTER THINKS OF HIS/HER FATHER AT DIFFERENT AGES
At 4 Years : My daddy is great.
At 6 Years : My daddy knows everybody.
At 10 Years: My daddy is good but is short tempered and knows little less than my friend's Daddy.
At 12 Years : My daddy was very nice to me when I was young.
At 14 Years : My daddy is getting fastidious.
At 16 Years : My daddy is not in line with the current times. Frankly he does not know anything.
At 18 Years : My daddy is becoming increasingly cranky.
At 20 Years : Oh! Its becoming difficult to tolerate daddy. Wonder how Mother puts up with him.
At 25 Years : Daddy is objecting to everything. Don't know when he will understand the world.
At 30 Years : It's becoming difficult to manage my son. I was so scared of my father when I was young.
At 40 Years : Daddy brought me up with so much discipline. I wonder how he managed to handle the younger generation.
At 45 Years : I am baffled as to how my daddy brought us up.
At 50 Years : My daddy faced so many hardships to bring us up. (We were four brothers and sisters). I am unable to manage a single son.
At 55 Years : My daddy was so far sighted and planned so many things for us. Even at this old age, he is able to control things. He is one of his kind and unique.
At 60 Years : My daddy was great.
Thus, it took 56 years to complete the cycle and come back to the 1st stage!So.................................Realise it in time.

Marketing Lecture at IIM

1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am very rich. Marry me!" - That's Direct Marketing
2. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says: "He's very rich. Marry him." - That's Advertising.
3. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day, you call and say: "Hi, I'm very rich. Marry me." - That's Telemarketing.
4. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten your tie, you walk up to her and pour her a drink, you open the door (of the car)for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her ride and then say:"By the way, I'm rich. Will you marry me?" - That's Public Relations 5. You're! at a party and see gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says: "You are very rich! Can you marry ! me?" - That's Brand Recognition.
6. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am very rich. Marry me!" She gives you a nice hard slap on your face. - That's Customer Feedback.
7. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am very rich. Marry me!" And she introduces you to her husband. - That's demand and supply gap.
8. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say anything, another person come and tell her: "I'm rich. Will you marry me?" and she goes with him - That's competition eating into your market share.
9. You see and gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say: "I'm rich Marry me!" your wife arrives. - That's restriction for entering new markets

How to ask your Boss for a salary increase ?

One day you send a letter to your boss asking for an increase in your salary !
Dear Bo$$,
In thi$ life, we all need $ome thing mo$t de$perately. I think you $hould be under$tanding of the need$ of u$ worker$ who have given $o much $upport including $weat and $ervice to your company .
I am $ure you will gue$$ what I mean and re$pond $oon.

Your$ $incerely,

The next day, you received this letter of reply :
Oh my dear,

I kNOw you have been working very hard. NOwadays, NOthing much has changed. You must have NOticed that our company is NOt doing NOticeably well as yet . NOw the newspaper are saying the world`s leading ecoNOmists are NOt sure if the United States may go into aNOther recession. After the NOvember presidential elections things may turn bad. I have NOthing more to add NOw. You kNOw what I mean.

Yours truly,

Classic Definitions & Cool Meanings

1. Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.
2. Love affairs : Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.
3. Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master
4. Divorce : Future tense of marriage
5. Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".
6. Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
7. Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
8. Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power ...
9. Dictionary : A place where divorce comes before marriage.
10. Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.
11. Ecstasy : A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
12. Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.
13. Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
14. Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
15. Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
16. Etc. : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
17. Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
18. Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.
19. Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
20. Philosopher : A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
21. Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
22. Opportunist : A person who starts taking a bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
23. Optimist : A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."
24. Pessimist :- A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.
25. Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
26. Father : A banker provided by nature.
27. Criminal : A guy no different from the rest... except that he got caught.
28. Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
29. Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
30. Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.
31. Computer Engineer : One who gets paid for reading such mails... ( Sorry for this one - please excuse me for hurting you )

7 don'ts after a meal

1.Don't smoke - Experiment from experts proves that smoking a cigarette after meal is comparable to smoking 10 cigarettes (chances of cancer is higher).
2.Don't eat fruits immediately - Immediately eating fruits after meals will cause stomach to be bloated with air. Therefore take fruit 1-2 hr after meal or 1hr before meal.
3.Don't drink tea - Because tea leaves contain a high content of acid. This substance will cause the Protein content in the food we consume to be hardened thus difficult to digest.
4.Don't loosen your belt - Loosening the belt after a meal will easily cause the intestine to be twisted & blocked.
5.Don't bathe - Bathing will cause the increase of blood flow to the hands, legs & body thus the amount of blood around the stomach will therefore decrease. This will weaken the digestive system in our stomach.
6.Don't walk about - People always say that after a meal walk a hundred steps and you will live till 99. In actual fact this is not true. Walking will cause the digestive system to be unable to absorb the nutrition from the food we intake.
7.Don't sleep immediately - The food we intake will not be able to digestproperly. Thus will lead to gastric & infection in our intestine

Who works for India?

The population of India is 100 crores
But 19 crores are retired
That leaves 81 crores do the work
There are 25 crores in school which leaves 56 crores to do the work
Of this there are 22 crores employed by the Central Govt leaving 34 crores to do the work
4 crores are in the Armed Forces which leaves 30 crores to do the work
Take away from above total the 20 crores people work for State Governments (State Government employees officially do not work!)
and that leaves 10 crores to do the work
Total unemployed are 8 crores and that leaves 2 crores to do the work
At any given time there are 1.2 crore people in hospitals,
leaving 80 lakhs to do the work Now, according to Indian Statistical Institute, there are 79,99,998 people are in prisons throughout the country
That leaves just 2 people to do the work
You and me!!!
And currently YOU are sitting at your computer reading my blogSo I am, the only person in our country who is working!
And that is why India is surviving!!!
Now, please log out and do your job because, for a change, I want to rest. And I don't want India to suffer because of that!

A Minute

They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them.

15 Things You Probably Never Knew or Thought About

1. At least 5 people in this world love you so much they would die for you.
2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.
3.The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.
4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.
5.Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
6.You mean the world to someone.
7.If not for you, someone may not be living.
8.You are special and unique.
9.Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.
10.When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.
11.When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look: you most likely turned
your back on the world.
12.When you think you have no chance of getting what you want, you probably won't get it, but
if you believe in yourself, probably, sooner or later, you will get it.
13.Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.
14.Always tell someone how you feel about them; you will feel much better when theyknow.
15. If you have a great friend, take the time to let them know that they are great.

HOME TRICKS

While washing silk sarees add a little lemon juice. The colour won't fade and it will give a glossy finish. To remove the marks in furniture's, scratch with the paste made from ash of cigar and vinegar.
Cleaning the furniture with shoe polish will lend an excellent sheen to it.
The furniture becomes more bright and shiny if it is cleaned with the cloth dipped in strong tea.
Apply some wax or soap on the sides of the drawer for easy movement.
The furniture becomes more shiny if it is cleaned with mixture of olive oil and vinegar.
The gold will become more brighter if it is cleaned in pumpkin juice.
To remove the stain of wine from cloth clean that portion with the cloth dipped in soda.
To remove the stain of henna from the cloth, dip the cloth in warm milk for half an hour and wash with soap.
To remove ink stain from clothes, rub the area with a cotton bud soaked in eau-de-cologne.
While mopping the floor add two teaspoons of salt to the water to keep flies at bay.
To remove stains from utensils, add bleaching powder in a tub of water and dip the utensils before washing with detergent.
Used mosquito mats is an excellent blotting agent.
To keep a vaccum flask clean and odour free, fill up half the flask with vinegar, hot water and pieces of egg shell.
If two stamps stick together, keep it in a freezer for some time and peal them out.
Vinegar is an excellent cleanser for glassware
To prevent silver fish from attacking your clothes, keep a few 'kalonji' seeds tied in a muslin cloth in your cupboard.
Soak your silver articles in tamarind water for 30 minutes and wash off with fresh water, if you want them to shine like new.
To remove mud and mud strains from clothes, rub the affected area with potato stock and wash it with water.
To remove the tea stains from the vessels, take some water and add 2 teaspoon sodium bicarbonate and boil it. After some time, wash the vessel with detergent.
To remove lipstick stain, apply Vaseline on that portion and wash it with soap after some time.
To sharpen a sewing machine needle, stitch through a piece of sand paper.
Keep the water in your flower vase odourless for along time put a piece of charcoal in it.
Rub toothpaste over the fine scratches on glassware. It acts as a slight abrasive and smoothens out the area.
Soften hardened shoe polish with a few drops of white spirit.
Instead of scratching off candle wax from an object, hold the object close to a flame or some source of heat for a few seconds till the wax melts away.
Clean dust particles and dirt from your steel or iron sieve by holding it over the fire for some time. After the grime burns to soot and falls off, wash with soap and water. Your sieve will look better and shine like a new.
To soften a tight leather shoe, apply some curd on their inner surfaces at night.
'Agarbatti.' ash can be used to clean silver and brass articles.
In order to keep away the termites and insects from your bookshelves, keep few pieces of sandalwood.
Hardened glue becomes soft and useable again if you add some glycerin and warm water to it .
To remove the stains from white foot wear, soak a small cotton wool in nail polish remover and rub briskly on your foot wear.
Use a few drops of after shave lotion to get rid of a stubborn dirt from shoes.
Clean the silverware with dry ash or common salt for shiny appearance.
To clean your diamond ornaments, soak it in water for 15 minutes, add some washing powder and boil for 7 to 8 minutes and wash it in running water.
Put some bits of lemon peels in the pressure cooker while cooking, the cooker will remain white inside.
To remove the chewing-gum stuck to the floor, clean it with a little kerosene.
Nail polish remover is excellent for removing stains from bone china.
Diamonds will regain their luster if you rub a piece of chalk over them and wipe clean with a soft dry cloth.
Add a little water to used tea leaves and used them to clean glass and window panes for sparkling results.
To remove stains from vessels, rub it with a wet cloth dipped in baking soda.
To remove stains from brassware dip it in tamarind water for some time and wash it and then polish it using brasso.
To remove tea or coffee stains from steel cups clean it with salt water.
To clean non stick pans easily, pour some warm water into it and keep it for some time and then wash it with any detergent.
To remove the smell of masala form mixi, put few pieces of dry bread and powder it.

Bharat Ratna Award

India has produced a legacy of brave hearts since times immemorial. Probably there is not enough space to measure their sacrifices. However, we cannot close our eyes to those people who have made our country proud by excelling in their own fields and bringing us international recognition. Bharat Ratna is the highest civilian honour, given for exceptional service towards advancement of Art, Literature and Science, and in recognition of Public Service of the highest order. The original specifications for the award called for a circular gold medal, 35 mm in diameter, with the sun and the Hindi legend "Bharat Ratna" above and a floral wreath below. The reverse was to carry the state emblem and motto. It was to be worn around the neck from a white ribbon. This design was altered after a year. The provision of Bharat Ratna was introduced in 1954. The first ever Indian to receive this award was the famous scientist, Chandrasekhara Venkata Raman. Since then, many dignitaries, each a whiz in varied aspects of their career has received this coveted award.

Bharat Ratna Award Bharat Ratna Award (Reverse Side)

Bharat Ratna Awardees
Sr. No. NAME SUBJECT YEAR COUNTRY
40 Kumari Lata Dinanath Mangeshkar Arts 2001 India
39 Late. Ustad Bismillah Khan Arts 2001 India
38 Prof. Amartya Sen Literature & Education 1999 United Kingdom
37 Lokpriya Gopinath (posth.) Bordoloi Public Affairs 1999 India
36 Loknayak Jayprakash (Posth.) Narayan Public Affairs 1999 India
35 Pandit Ravi Shankar Arts 1999 United States
34 Shri Chidambaram Subramaniam Public Affairs 1998 India
33 Smt. M.S. Subbulakshmi Arts 1998 India
32 Shri (Dr.) A.P.J. Abdul Kalam Science & Engineering 1997 India
31 Smt. Aruna Asaf (Posth.) Ali Public Affairs 1997 India
30 Shri Gulzari Lal (Shri) Nanda Public Affairs 1997 India
29 Shri Jehangir Ratanji Dadabhai Tata Trade & Industry 1992 India
28 Shri Maulana Abul Kalam Azad Public Affairs 1992 India
27 Shri Satyajit Ray Arts 1992 India
26 Shri Morarji Ranchhodji Desai Public Affairs 1991 India
25 Shri Rajiv Gandhi Public Affairs 1991 India
24 Sardar Vallabhbhai Patel Public Affairs 1991 India
23 Dr. Bhimrao Ramji Ambedakr Public Affairs 1990 India
22 Dr. Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela Public Affairs 1990 South Africa
21 Shri Marudur Gopalan Ramachandran Public Affairs 1988 India
20 Khan Abdul Ghaffar Khan Social Work 1987 Pakistan
19 Shri Acharya Vinoba Bhave Social Work 1983 India
18 Mother Mary Teresa Bojaxhiu Teresa Social Work 1980 India
17 Shri Kumaraswamy Kamraj Public Affairs 1976 India
16 Shri V.V. Giri Public Affairs 1975 India
15 Smt. Indira Gandhi Public Affairs 1971 India
14 Shri Lal Bahadur Shastri Public Affairs 1966 India
13 Dr. Pandurang Vaman Kane Social Work 1963 India
12 Dr. Zakir Hussain Public Affairs 1963 India
11 Dr. Rajendra Prasad Public Affairs 1962 India
10 Dr. Bidhan Chandra Roy Public Affairs 1961 India
09 Shri Purushottam Das Tandon Public Affairs 1961 India
08 Dr. Dhondo Keshav Karve Social Work 1958 India
07 Pt. Govind Ballabh Pant Public Affairs 1957 India
06 Dr. Bhagwan Das Literature & Education 1955 India
05 Shri Jawaharlal Nehru Public Affairs 1955 India
04 Dr. M. Vishweshwariah Civil Service 1955 India
03 Shri Chakravarti Rajagopalachari Public Affairs 1954 India
02 Dr. Chandrasekhara Venkata Raman Science & Engineering 1954 India
01 Dr. Sarvapalli Radhakrishnan Public Affairs 1954 India

COOL PJs

1. A scientist disconnected his doorbell....... can u guess why???
Cos he wanted to win the No-bell prize!!!!!!!!!!
2. Who is the only Aussie cricketer who always smiles, even if he is declared out???
Hussey..............
3. What did the policeman say when he arrested Hussey???
Hussey to phasi !!!!
4. Ship tha..jisme bahut saare log the...usme ek chor bhi tha..ship iceberg se takra gayi or sab dhub gaye ...sirf chor bacch gaya batao kaise?
kyun ki chor ki daadhi me tinka tha..
dhubte hue ko tinka ka sahara mil gaya ...
or chor bachh gaya
5. Ek Kana Ladka Kisi ladki ko Prapose kare to kaun sa gana Gayega???????
Ek Nazar se b Pyar Hot a hai Maine suna Hai...............................................
6. Highly complicated PJ - wat wud an angrez say to his indian naukar who can only understand hindi if he wants him 2 open the door!!
"There Was A Cold Day "(say it fast)
7. What is the colour of frequency??
Purple
how ?? frequency ka unit hai Hz u can write it as 1/sec ie. par second in hindi second
is also caled as pal therefore
PARPAL
8. Sholay movie mai kis ka double role tha?
King George .coin ke dono side rehta hai
9. according to movie Sholay who is son of lion.............
HOLI Gabbar bolta hai na
holi cub hai cub hai holi (cub)

Beautiful Photos

Bittu's Collection of Beautiful Pictures of her favorite characters

Facts On India

Official Name : Bharat (Hindi), Republic of India (English)
Capital : New Delhi
Population : 1, 027, 015, 247 (2001 Census)
Area : 3.3 million square kilometers
Geographical Location : Between latitudes 8 ° 4' and 37 ° 6 ' north and longitudes 68 ° 7 ' and 97° 25' east
Coastline Length : 7600 km
Major Religions : Hinduism, Islam, Christianity, Buddhism, Sikhism, Jainism
Literacy : 65.38%
President : Pratibha Patil
Prime Minister : Dr. Manmohan Singh
National Anthem : Jan gana mana written by Rabindranath Tagore
National Song : Vande Mataram, composed in Sanskrit by Bankimchandra Chatterji
National Emblem : Replica of the Lion Capital of Sarnath
National Animal : Tiger (Panthera tigris)
National Bird : Peacock
National Flower : Lotus
National Tree : Banyan
National Fruit : Mango
National Currency : Rupee (One Rupee=100 paise)
National Sport : Hockey
Languages : India has two National languages (Central administrative). They are English (associate official) and Hindi (in the Devanagiri script). The Indian Constitution also officially recognizes 22 regional languages.
National Flag : Horizontal tricolor in equal proportion of deep saffron on the top, white in the middle and dark green at the bottom. In the center of the white band is a wheel in navy blue color

CHILD RIGHTS

SAVE THE CHILD RIGHTS

7 reasons the world will end in 2012

Scientific experts from around the world are genuinely predicting that five years from now, all life on Earth could well finish. Some are saying it'll be humans that set it off. Others believe that a natural phenomenon will be the cause. And the religious folks are saying it'll be God himself who presses the stop button...

1. Mayan Calendar

The first mob to predict 2012 as the end of the world were the Mayans, a bloodthirsty race that were good at two things: Building highly accurate astrological equipment out of stone and Sacrificing Virgins. Thousands of years ago they managed to calculate the length of the lunar moon as 329.53020 days, only 34 seconds out. The Mayan calendar predicts that the Earth will end on December 21, 2012. Given that they were pretty close to the mark with the lunar cycle, it's likely they've got the end of the world right as well.

2. Sun Storms

Solar experts from around the world monitoring the sun have made a startling discovery: our sun is in a bit of strife. The energy output of the sun is, like most things in nature, cyclic, and it's supposed to be in the middle of a period of relative stability. However, recent solar storms have been bombarding the Earth with so much radiation energy, it's been knocking out power grids and destroying satellites. This activity is predicted to get worse, and calculations suggest it'll reach its deadly peak sometime in 2012

3. The Atom Smasher
Scientists in Europe have been building the world's largest particle accelerator. Basically its a 27km tunnel designed to smash atoms together to find out what makes the Universe tick. However, the mega-gadget has caused serious concern, with some scientists suggesting that it's properly even a bad idea to turn it on in the first place. They're predicting all manner of deadly results, including mini black holes. So when this machine is fired up for its first serious experiment in 2012, the world could be crushed into a super-dense blob the size of a basketball.

4. The Bible says...
If having scientists warning us about the end of the world isn't bad enough, religious folks are getting in on the act as well. Interpretations of the Christian Bible reveal that the date for Armageddon, the final battle between Good and Evil, has been set down for 2012. The I Ching, also known as the Chinese book of Changes, says the same thing, as do various sections of the Hindu teachings.

5. Super Volcano

Yellowstone National Park in the United States is famous for its thermal springs and Old Faithful geyser. The reason for this is simple - it's sitting on top of the world's biggest volcano, and geological experts are beginning to get nervous sweats. The Yellowstone volcano has a pattern of erupting every 650,000 years or so, and we're many years overdue for an explosion that will fill the atmosphere with ash, blocking the sun and plunging the Earth into a frozen winter that could last up to 15,000 years. The pressure under the Yellowstone is building steadily, and geologists have set 2012 as a likely date for the big bang.

6. The Physicists
This one's case of bog-simple maths mathematics. Physicists at Berkeley University have been crunching the numbers and they've determined that the Earth is well overdue for a major catastrophic event. Even worse, they're claiming their calculations proves, that we're all going to die, very soon - while also saying their prediction comes with a certainty of 99 percent- and 2012 just happens to be the best guess as to when it occurs.

7. Slip-Slop-Slap- BANG!
We all know the Earth is surrounded by a magnetic field that shields us from most of the sun's radiation. What you might not know is that the magnetic poles we call north and south have a nasty habit of swapping places every 750,000 years or so - and right now we're about 30,000 years overdue. Scientists have noted that the poles are drifting apart roughly 20-30kms each year, much faster than ever before, which points to a pole-shift being right around the corner. While the pole shift is underway, the magnetic field is disrupted and will eventually disappear, sometimes for up to 100 years. The result is enough UV outdoors to crisp your skin in seconds, killing everything it touches